Don't Judge Me

Of all the goals Beverly has set, becoming unoffendable is among the toughest. Brant Hansen author of Unoffendable points out, “Anger is extraordinarily easy. It’s our default setting.” Though Beverly’s personal default setting is happiness - keeping the dial there in a culture filled with strife, violence, and angst is no small feat.

Lewis calls the art of not being offended “sitting down on the inside.” When you sit down on the inside, you liberate yourself by letting go of the need to be right. It’s a choice to put down a prideful attitude and listen to another person. Even if they’re wrong. You may feel justified to be offended by someone’s words or actions. You may feel vindicated when you react. But if you’re interested in building enduring relationships, there has to be a better way. 

When you feel offended by another, it’s a sign you have passed judgement. The statement “judgement demands punishment” implies that someone is going to get hurt. It might be you. It might be the other person. Most likely, it will be both of you. Therein is the motivation to make the effort to bridge the communication gap.

Author John Bevere states, “An offended heart is the breeding ground of deception.” Being offended is a choice – and not a wise one for leaders. Fill in the pot holes in the road to leadership with Beverly’s insights.